Hey mister, you gotta fork?

It has become a bit of a tradition with our family to visit the local Mexican restaurant after church on some Sundays.  The boys begged to go to “cheese dip” today, and neither Tonya nor I felt like cooking, so we easily relented.  Our routine is actually quite simple:  sit down, order our cheese dip, the boys rip open their napkins, and inevitably a fork hits the floor.

This time, it was Jack, my youngest son’s, turn to drop his fork.  Tired of trying to flag down our waiter to ask for a replacement, we told Jack he needed to go ask for a replacement himself.  “Uh-uh Mama!”, his face turning red anticipating the coming embarrassment.  Again we reminded him that if he wanted to eat his lunch, he would have to go ask for a new fork.  “Go see that man over there and ask for fork”, we insisted.

Finally, Jack built the courage and tip-toed over to our waiter.  He looked up, said something, and the gentleman immediately complied.  Soon Jack was on his way back to the table with not one, but three forks – grinning ear to ear.  We asked Jack what he had said to the man and he replied “Hey mister, you gotta fork?”

Looking back on the exchange, I am reminded of how we all make strides in overcoming our fears.  It felt strange seeing my little one taking those tentative first steps into an uneasy situation.  And to see the sense of accomplishment on his face when he faced down his fears and won, what a proud moment.

I had the opportunity to meet Dr. Thom Rainer, president & CEO of Lifeway Christian Resources, a couple days ago.  My teaching mentor and I were working a Sunday School leadership event at the GA Baptist Conference Center in Toccoa, GA and Dr. Rainer was the keynote speaker.  It was a remarkable opportunity for such a short tenured new manager to get to meet the highest ranking person in the Lifeway organization.  And I knew it, too.

Strange though, for some reason when the moment arrived for me to meet Dr. Rainer, I was far from nervous.  In fact, I was quite relaxed, and was able to share a great conversation with him.

Looking back, I attribute my comfort in conversation to two thing.  One, it is readily apparent that God has placed me in this position for a reason and deep down I know that I don’t need to feel stress in these situations.  Secondly, I realize that with many years of experiences like this (meeting several ’powerful’ individuals), I have developed a real comfort with the gifts God has given me.  I need not worry that I will be accused of being in the wrong place or speaking out of turn.

When we face our fears and succeed, we gain confidence for the next opportunity.  In this case, the fears I’ve faced in the past served me well to comfort me in the present.  Only through God’s grace can we confidently face our fears and win.

What fears are you facing right now?  What makes you tremble at the very thought of encountering?  Have you given your concerns to Jesus?  Will you?

Daddy, I want to be a disciple

Talk about powerful words.  And considering they came from my five year old son, they’re even more powerful.  My five year old, Ted, decided to tell me his vision for his life today.

He and I were taking a drive this evening, talking about Jesus and our loved ones who’ve gone to be with him.  (We talk quite a bit about his Great Grandmother who passed a couple years ago).  He knows that “Great” is so happy now that she’s with Jesus.  As a father, I want nothing more than to see my children come to know Jesus as their personal Lord and Saviour.  So, I’m keen to have these discussions with Ted now that he seems capable of understanding more.

But, imagine my suprise when he tells me that when he grows up he wants to be a disciple and tell other people about Jesus.  He went on to tell me that he wanted to read the Bible to his friends who don’t have Bibles.

Whoa!  My five year old is speaking words of maturity far beyond his years.  Just when I couldn’t get any prouder, his eyes got bigger as a light bulb went on in his mind.  “Daddy, in your new job, you’re a disciple!  You get to tell people about Jesus at your work!” 

If there were ever any doubts about whether I made the right decision to work in the Christian resource field, they’re gone now.  Having my son’s stamp of approval on my new job has made it all worth while. 

I like Mexican bagels too!

If you’ve read many of my blog entries, you might know that recording my thoughts in cyberspace is a relatively recent effort.   I only began this blog upon losing my job in the heavy equipment sales business.  When I look back over the several years I was in that business, I prefer now to think fondly on the great lifelong friendships and professional relationships forged during those eight years.  I don’t look back upon the stress, long commutes, and the pressure-cooker atmosphere with fondness.

That being said, my forced 6-week holiday had been rather nice.  The timing couldn’t have been better.  I got to spend the better part of the summer vacation with my boys and my wife every day.  There was quite a bit of quality time together.  Now, with school back in session, I’ve been given the opportunity to drop the boys off and pick them up each day. 

All the while, I’ve maintained a steady job search.  During this hiatus, I was only afforded two quality interviews – one which would return me to the heavy equipment business, and one that would lead me in an entirely different direction.  While it appeared I was on track to be offered a position at either company, I took the first offer that came my way.  I will begin my career with Lifeway Christian Stores next week as a Store Manager in Training.

There is much excitement around our house surrounding the new position.  Not only am I changing directions professionally, buy our personal lives are about to be upended.  The new position with Lifeway requires our family to relocate.  As the training program is quite extensive, and will stretch into the fall, I do not yet know where we’ll be transferred to.  While this isn’t a big concern to me, I understand the stress of not knowing weighs heavily on my wife.

Relocating doesn’t seem to be a big concern for my boys, though.  We’ve made sure we speak about moving a lot in their presence, so they’ll begin to understand what is to come.  We don’t have much experience moving with a four and five year old in tow, so we’re trying to cover all bases.  They seem to be taking it in stride.

The five year old, who seems to have the sage wisdom of a child twice his age, seems quite intrigued with the move.  When I mentioned that Texas may be a possible new home, he had a strange response, though.  He said that Texas would be a great place to live because he and I could “eat Mexican bagels together.”  I have to admit, the boy must have learned from his father that Texas is home to many Mexican transplants.  So, it made a little sense to me that he’d associate Texas with Mexican people.  But Mexican bagels?

 I probed a bit further.  “What are you talking about son?  Mexican bagels?” 

“You know, we can eat more of those things we like for breakfast – those Mexican bagels.”

I started to put it together.  Our favorite breakfast food of late is a simple English Muffin.  “Do you mean English muffin?”

“Yeah, that’s what I mean.  We can eat more of those English muffins for breakfast if we move to Texas!”

It was then that I realized that the impending move, no matter where God takes us, is not going to be as stressful as anticipated.  I’ve been given a wonderful family, with an adventuresome (often humorous) spirit.  We’re going to have so much fun over the next few months, and I firmly believe we’ll look back very soon and say this was the best professional move I’ve ever been forced to make.

Bubba needed to tell me about God going bowling

Did anyone ever tell you that the thunder was simply God tossing a bowling ball down the alley?  And that the lightning was God making a strike?  I know we’ve used this story to remind our children that the storms outside are God’s doing, and not something we should dread or fear.

Last night the storm clouds chased us in at about dusk.  It was about time to put the boys to bed anyway (school night).  Not long after they settled in, read their Bible story and said their prayers, the storm arrived.  We thought nothing of it until we headed to bed ourselves a couple hours later.

Passing by to check on the boys, my wife noticed that our youngest, the four year old, was not in his bed.  Her curiousity peaked, she peered into the dark room.  She found him curled up next to his older brother, the five year old.  She called me in to ask if I thought we should put him back in his own bed.  I said that there was no harm in the boys sharing a bed, especially with thunder and lightning outside.

This morning, when we asked the boys about why they slept in the same bed, our youngest had an awesome response.  “Bubba needed to tell me about God going bowling.” 

It was then that I realized just how much our words mean to our children.  Their attitudes, thoughts, fears, concerns, and interests are shaped by observing those that mean the most to them.  And the process of transference never stops.  The five year old learns from his parents.  The four year old learns from the five year old and his parents.  Come to think of it, I am the man I am today because of the influence of my parents and sister.

I must pledge to never forget that whatever I do or say, I’m always being watched by someone.  Whether I like it or not, I’m a role model for someone.  And you are too.  I certainly don’t want to be the one who teaches a bad habit, or a poor attitude.  Instead, I want to view my responsiblity as a challenge to be a better person overall.

Making cookies in your underwear

 Who would have thought that a batch of peanut butter cookies would generate so much interest? 

I’ll admit, it started with a personal craving that simply wouldn’t go away.  After all, who can resist the thought of those yummy homemade cookies?  Since my lovely wife wouldn’t give in to my incessant pleadings for her version of these treats, I decided to do something about it myself.  So after a few minutes of digging through the recipe box, I came upon an acceptable version and started on my own batch.

Within minutes, the sound of pans and mixing bowls in the kitchen peaked the interest of two inquisitive boys in the adjacent room.  What was Dad doing in the kitchen, a place he so seldom frequents?  Soon I found myself surrounded by little hands just begging for the chance to help.  Since we weren’t planning on making these cookies public, I didn’t see the need to ask the boys to dress beyond their current state – Disney Cars underwear. 

I learned quickly that the older one had much experience making cookies with Mom, so I could trust him with the spoon.  At least that’s what he told me.  Our golden retriever enjoyed the overflow.

The younger one didn’t have as much experience as his brother, but certainly wasn’t going to let that slow him down.  Needing two eggs cracked, I demonstrated the proper technique on the first one.  Before I could finish pouring the egg into the bowl, he had already gone for the second.  Needless to say, the result wasn’t pretty.  Thank goodness we have plenty of eggs.  

The real fun came at criss-cross time.  You may recall that proper peanut butter cookies must have a criss-cross pattern on top.  This is achieved by using a standard fork, whetted with cold water, and pressed at 90 degree angles in the cookie dough.  With two cookie sheets full of dough balls, the boys set about creating patterns.  It reminded me of building castles in the sand. 

One would strive for absolute perfection while forgetting to wet the fork (and subsequently pulled the dough ball off the sheet).  The other simply smeared the product all over the sheet.  At first, I felt the need to correct and scold.  But I soon realized that these guys were so excited about helping me, that I decided the cookie pattern just wasn’t that important for this project.

The net result of our labor?  A very tasty batch of homemade peanut butter cookies.

The net result of our time together?  A memory that will last a lifetime.

That’s what it’s all about…

 

Must’ve been a wrong turn in Albuquerque…

Have you ever thought to yourself “How in the world did I get here?!?”  “What choices did I make in the past that brought me to this place at this time?”  Goodness knows I have.  It usually hits you when you are at a crossroads of your family life, career, spiritual journey.  These are typically the times you ”remove the clutter” (see earlier post) in your mind and start to focus inward.  At a time of mental clarity we sieze the opportunity to evaluate many facets of our lives.

If you are like me, these moments of reflection can often be dominated by negative ‘what if” scenarios.  “If I had chosen this school over that one, I might be further ahead in my career right now.”  “If I had taken the job in city ‘A’ instead of city ‘B’, I bet I’d be making more money now.”  “If I hadn’t said that to him, I might still have that friendship.”  The older one gets, the more possible scenarios on which to reflect.

Who can change the past?  I know we often write these relections off as a desire to learn from past mistakes and an attempt to make better decisions going forward.  But, I’m beginning to think viewing our past choices in a negative light is actually a very destructive process.  Who wants to look back and think so many negative thoughts?  Who wants to believe that they are capable of making so many ‘bad’ decisions?

To these thoughts I now say “What a waste of time!”  If I can’t focus on the good things that my past has brought to me, then I’m not going to pay much attention to it at all.  When looking back, I have a choice.   I can focus on the negative like I’ve typically always done.  Or, I can look at the awesome things that I have now because of the choices made so long ago.

I can think to myself:  “I shouldn’t have taken that job, because I got laid off and I’m right back where I started.” OR “I’m glad I took that job because I learned these great skills and they provided great benefits and a decent income for X years of my life.”

I can think to myself:  “If I’d gone on to grad school I would have gotten the degree that is much demand right now.”  OR “If I’d gone on to grad school I wouldn’t have taken that entry level job that exposed me to a ‘real world’ work environment early in my career.”

Or (my favorite and most personal scenario), I can think to myself:  “If I had stayed at school A instead of transferring to school B, I could have finished college so much sooner and I bet I’d be in a completely different (and more interesting) career field right now.”  OR “If I had stayed at school A instead of transferring to school B, I would have never met my wife, had these awesome kids, and I might have never gotten back into a close relationship with God.”

On second thought, I believe I made the right turn in Albuquerque…

How much does money cost?

You read correctly.  How much does money cost?

Have you ever stopped to consider everything you have to do in order to earn $1.00?  Think about it.  A lonely one dollar bill.  Old George doesn’t get much respect these days.  But, he still carries some weight (especially at the dollar store).  What does it really take to earn one of these puppies?

You might have heard it said that every dollar you earn is a ‘certificate of appreciation’ for a deed that you have done.  It’s true.  Each dollar you see in your wallet is a result of someone (hopefully you) having provided a service or product for someone else.  With this in mind, I suggest we start to view money in a different light.  Why shouldn’t we view money as equal to the efforts you put forth to earn it?

So, when considering how much your money costs it is important to view it in terms of the time, efforts, knowledge, and skills you used to acquire it.  What God-given talents do you possess which facilitated your ability to earn that dollar bill?  Was it worth the sacrifice of those talents to earn that dollar bill?  Did you pay too much?  Did you get a bargain?

Unemployed and loving it!

The best part about being unemployed for the last few weeks is that I’ve been able to clear my mind of the daily clutter interrupting my life.  What do I mean by “daily clutter”?  Think about it.  After spending nearly every workday for the past three years waking well before dawn just so I could beat a little of Atlanta’s nightmarish traffic, then spend ten hours dealing with difficult (often conflicting) circumstances at the office, only to spend another two hours sitting in more Atlanta traffic on the way home – well, I was a little burned out.

You see, I am most decidedly a victim of the circumstances I chose for myself.  Twice in my working career I’ve pursued the position which required me to commute over 60 miles each way (did I tell you about the nightmarish Atlanta traffic yet?).  both times, the position was a perceived promotion over the existing position.  My intentions were all noble.  Afterall, with a family and the desire for more money to support said family, pursuing better positions only made sense, right?  Isn’t it my God-given duty to take care of my family?  What else was I to do?

I hope to take you, my readers, through my experiences of the last few years (and hopefully drag you in to my future) and perhaps share some wisdom gained through it all.  My desire is that you will gain some insight into your own situation and perhaps reevaluate the areas of your life, your money, and your spirituality along the way.

Please join me from time to time to learn more about my story.  I look forward to sharing it.

Steve